When 3 F's Are Acceptable

If you come into my office and see my desk—you would probably give me an “F”, but not for the reason you may be thinking. Anyone who has ever gone to school knows an “F” is usually associated with a negative response, either from a teacher, your own self-esteem, or the ultimate-- parental disappointment! An “F” is usually written in red and refers to “failed”! Many other words that also start with that letter and have negative connotations, such as, “fall short of”, “fault”, ”fizzle”, “flop”, “false”, “flunk”, “finances”, ”fart” (yes I DID just write that!). Then there are some negative F’s that describe me….” Frizzy Forty-something”, four years to fifty”, & “frequently forgetful”!!!!                                                                                                                                                                                                                

When I was trying to come up with name for my blog, Gary who is sometimes a bit of a Facetious Fireman (yes I actually looked up “F” words to use for that comment), gave me today’s alliteration or title. I really wasn’t sure where he was going with it… until he said in a serious voice “Family, Friends and Faith”!

Wow, he came up with a good one, but not quite the angle I eventually want to go with this blogsite, so I decided to save it for one of the titles of a blog. I chose this week to post this particular one for a number of reasons: one being grades are coming out, it’s Flu season, but mostly because during this time of year it always seems to be about Family, Friends and Faith—preparing for the Holidays.

I truly believe the Fall Season (oh cool that one wasn’t even planned!!!), is such a perfect time of year. As the Holidays approach, we are reminded of spending more time with our loved ones, whether it is Family or Friends or both. Then onto Christmas which is still about those, but with a focus on Faith!!! It seems to be a common denominator in finishing up the year. Just like the Norman Rockwell paintings depicting the perfect scenes. Sure we have other times throughout the year that we may spend time with the F’s—birthdays, Easter and other religious/special holidays, but for Thanksgiving and Christmas time, we seem to be much more focused (again—not planned!) on the 3 good F’s.

Unfortunately, in reality, if this festive functional family & friend gathering is a fantasy for some, or if the thought of this season brings heart palpitations from anxious thoughts of “what if…”-- then that is when you throw in the faith, and you pray for fun amongst the dysfunction! There is always a twist to the perfect holiday or a price to pay.

I hope you are blessed with the 3 good F’s that make this holiday season a fabulous time together. However, if you are “blessed” with the 3 that put the frost in the air during a heat wave….I give you 3 new good F’s: forgetfulness—to help eliminate any distressful moments; forgiveness—to forgive your crazy family member or friend after posting the most embarrassing pictures of you: and food—to save you from having to have the awkward conversations or free you from football games as you prepare the meals.

Whatever words you regard as the Good F’s—keep in mind, Family can sometimes be fastidious; Friends can occasionally be fleeting, but Faith is the formula for FOREVER!

I’M LIMEGREEN AND BLUE, WHAT COLOR ARE YOU???

No, I didn’t take a Facebook Quiz, nor am I suffering from some alien force abduction. We now live in a day where “Awareness Ribbons” have become our car decals, new way to accessorize for fashions or in some instance, our identity now. For years, we have tied a yellow ribbon around a tree to symbolize our support of the troops who are away fighting for us; we have been pinked by many products, commercial or fundraisers in awareness of Breast Cancer; and for a brief moment in time, there was even a “silent” standoff with a newscaster in our area, who was not allowed to wear a red ribbon in support of AIDS research. However, she would still wear it hidden under her lapel or in other various places that she would have been proud to say “Look”. Thus, people having been fighting a cause, in different colors for the past 30 or more years.

So on September 3^rd, 2002, I found out “my color” would now be…limegreen! I was now going to be making others aware of my fight with Lymphoma—Non Hodgkin’s Lymphoma. Ok-- they don’t hand you a ribbon and say, "Here’s your sign” (that’s Bill Engvall!). Why limegreen?? That made me think, if Pink is because it’s usually a woman with BC-- then how come limegreen?—aliens??? I didn’t get it—and who really cares. Anyway, back to awareness ribbons---I received my first one from Holly Horton, the mother of one of my students. ;) About half way through my treatment, she sent a limegreen bag to school with her then 4^th grade son, and inside was a limegreen magnet for my car, a limegreen bracelet and a limegreen lapel pin!!! I was set!! And boy did I show off those things proudly! Not because I wanted everyone to know I had cancer, but to say I too have a “Cause”!!!

Since I became affiliated with a Cause… Lymphoma, and suddenly my wardrobe had more limegreen, my notebooks, my pens, my choice of handbags, etc.—I was so AWARE of limegreen, and what I could purchase in limegreen—as if the proceeds of my color went to help Lymphoma (even though they didn't). So to tie it into a “Cause”, I decided to get involved with Cancer Awareness, in general, through the Relay For Life—now I had lot’s of purple too. :) But I still was known to wear a limegreen ball cap.

During one of the Relays, I decided to honor all the different Survivors from all the various cancers by having a Balloon in “their color” released during Opening Ceremonies, so all the people there could see all the colors associated with the different kinds of cancer. It almost sounds sacrilegious to think of how beautiful a group of balloons looked floating away, but it did. 

There are so many different colors and you can kind of see why they choose certain ones. Like pink for Breast Cancer, then gold is for Childhood Cancers, because children are precious and gold is precious!! Red is for the heart disease--duh. I love the puzzle pieces for Autism, and the butterflies for Epilepsy. Then they have changed a few, some have two or three colors associated, not sure why, or even why some websites list one color, then another one says a different one. Who decided on these colors in the first place? You can find different websites to find the color for a particular cancer or cause.

Eight years later, I still wear my limegreen proudly, have

the magnet on my car and flash my bracelet, but I am now wearing a new color!! This color, ironically has been a part of my life since 1980, but I never knew the color until about 3 weeks ago! I am now the “proud awareness ribbon wearer” of the color BLUE!!! It is for Rheumatoid Arthritis (more to come in future Blogs about this). October 12, was Arthritis Awareness Day, and hey they didn’t JUST wear BLUE—this day was called “DO BLUE”…. This year I was definitely not very creative, but watch out next year—Smurfs there’s a new blue one in town!! Maybe I’ll see if I can join the “Blue Man Group”—oh wait would that be “Blue Person Group” then?? Never mind…just another thought for a blog.

This Blog is dedicated to the friends I have in common with my colors…the Lymphoma Limegreeners—especially little David (who is Gold and Limegreen), and my Blue Friends--RA Warrior friends and especially my dear friend Heidi & her two kids, who along with their mom and grandmother, have Juvenile Rheumatoid Arthritis also!!! We all are dedicated to these causes—to bring more awareness to these fights!!

Now that you know I’m limegreen and blue—what are you? Here are some websites to help find YOUR color!

http://www.choosehope.com/ 

 http://www.craftsnscraps.com/jewelry/ribbons.html

It’s All in the Name or Is It?

In most cases, when one is born, a name has either been a long thought out process by the baby’s parents; one passed down through generations; given in honor of someone special; or perhaps just a name they liked; and in some instances, the name is thought to be “fun and creative”-- a play on words! I’m a teacher, and have seen these children’s records come through the office, and the reactions on people’s faces when they read the name- out loud. For fun one day, we all listed on a white board some of the oddest names we have come across, either heard or actually saw, here's just a taste of what we had on the list:(make sure you pronounce them correctly) Lemonjello & Orangejello—that should have been LeMongelo & OrRangelo!  Jubal Lee, Aphroditie & Adonnis, Belle Pepper, Batman Bin Suparman, just to name a few. Honestly, why not just send the child to school with a target drawn on their shirt??

These situations can sometimes make or break a kid. Especially as they enter school, and have to “explain” their name or correct it as the teacher tries, but verbally assaults it. Hence, the beginnings of a nick name to avoid the humiliation of the other children knowing. Although, I have a friend, who was actually given the name “Baby Girl” on her birth certificate—I think her parents thought a name would just come to them when she was born, but having two other children still in diapers at the time, they were a bit exhausted, and so they decided to think of one later. But in order to leave the hospital she had to have something on her Birth Certificate, so she was named by the hospital- Baby Girl! And her college friends were not so kind, once we knew this information. :) But by then, she had learned to live with it, and had a pretty good sense of humor about it. Now-a-days, you must leave the hospital with a name, anything. However, if this is the case, the person can always change it later to a name they prefer. Hey that’s what Prince, the singer/songwriter, did—he became—a symbol, consequently an unpronounceable symbol, and is now “Formerly known as Prince”! Come on, seriously, do you really think he actually thought that out long and hard??

Even though your given name can be changed, if you choose to do so, everyone comes with a last name--the generational lineage of who we really are-- where we come from, and who we descended from. It gives us a stronghold of heritage and culture, a link to our fore fathers. And for some--a bullying target! For those who were fortunate enough NOT to have a “unique” surname, let me give you a taste of what it was like growing up with the last name Fell. My maiden name, the name my step-mom, sister-in-laws, nieces and nephews now share, is a first grade spelling word, so how bad could that be? Besides having to always say, “F like in Frank-E-L-L” when on the phone, because inevitably they think you said “Sell”, or there are the phonetically challenged ones who spell it Felt or Feld or Phell. But then there is the comedic sides of having a last name like this-- if I had a penny for every time I heard someone say, “Nancy Fell—did she hurt herself”?  AND then laugh, as if they were the first one to say it, I would be rich!!! Oh that wasn’t all, not only did we hear that all the time, you would see things written next to our name like…”Fell down and go boom”. (like the samples in the pictures of my corresponding friends) Oh, and I loved the ones when I was dating, friends would suggest finding a man with the last name “Apart” or “Off” or “Over” or classic “Down” and hyphen my new name to be Nancy Fell-_____!  haha I have to admit it made me have a sense of humor about it all, that I learned to just add to it. Since my middle initial is “R”, in college I convinced everyone to believe my mom’s maiden name was Reeley, and since she picked my first name, my dad got to pick my middle name, so he decided to go with my mom’s maiden name, which meant I was Nancy Reeley Fell—they bought it, now who’s laughing??? So you CAN make the best of a unique situation. Although some of these name games may be too much, and we would be back on the “You named your child what?” bandwagon. You know like, if my grandmother got her way and convinced my parents to name the twins-- Jack and Jill Fell or to name one of us Grace or Tripp! Phew that was a close one---so it is safe to say, we don’t have any like that in our family......yet!

On that note, I dedicate this Blog to the man who blessed me with my REAL (no pun intended) middle name of Renėe, my Dad; who has had to live with the Fell jokes a lot longer than any of us has, and who I learned from to take what you have and make the best of it! As much as it was a bulls-eye for jokes and teasing—it was one I am proud to have and been part of, whatever European lineage we come from. However, so much for the heritage or genealogy of a name—we have never been completely clear on where the name “Fell” actually came from. The irony to having a name that “means something about your past” is, we probably are just descendants from a clumsy Englishman.

Because of the Daisies

Finding a name for my Blog was such a difficult decision, and I found this to be more challenging then actually writing a blog. I have had family & friends (yes a few) :) , who have asked me to start my own blog. But to be honest, even though I have tons to say--those who know me can vouch for that-- I just didn’t have the right “name” for a Blogsite. After much time and deliberation (with my husband, Gary), and scratching off ones that wouldn’t work, I finally came up with “Because of the Daisies”.  A bit more of a serious side than I wanted it to be, but for what I want to say- it truly is just the right one!

Usually I am drawn to “play on words”, maybe because part of my job is helping kids with language issues, or possibly because I’m a visual learner and they help me to visualize things better, or just that I have a strange sense of humor. Whatever the reason may be, I really wanted something fun and catchy, or something that when I tell people the name of my Blog site—they would say, “Oh that is so clever!” I wanted something to tell people a bit about me or my life, without being negative or a phrase that would draw people in, but not followers who were hoping for a whole other category (i.e. ”nancysjoint”  is probably not one that people would instantly think I was going to tell them about why my fingers look the way they do…). But, as I discovered late one night—just about every fun, catchy, cute, clever, original and creative Blog name is-- “Unavailable”! Are you kidding me? As Gary said (and by the way thought of the ultimate title ), sometimes you just have to step away from what you think you are aiming for…”

My goal for this Blog is to talk about what I have been through in my life up until now, and how it has made me who I am today—for all you “lucky” people who have seen this transformation. :)  My story is probably no more unique in ways than anyone else (everyone has a story), but I feel like God has brought me through my storms with the help and strength of others He has blessed me with in my life, and by my Faith in Him. Therefore, I am going to try to dedicate each Blog I write to a person who has been in my life for a reason, a season or a lifetime.

I dedicate this Blog and title of the site to my mom, who along with my faith gave me the perseverance to hold on to the sail when the wind is blowing me off my ship! She may not be here to read my words, but there is no doubt in my mind she has still helped inspire these words and helps me wake up every single day and thank God for the strength He has given me.

Daisies were her favorite flower—hence, the reason my spare bedroom is done in daisies, my office cubicle, flowers in my wedding, and now my Blog; and most importantly she is the reason I collected a daisy for every chemotherapy treatment and each bone marrow biopsy I was “graced” with. (My profile picture is of these particular daisies). So whenever I am having a tough day or making a hard decision, I look at my vase and think -- because of the daisies-- I can do it!!! Thus the name is perfect. :)  I would have never thought a daisy, which means innocence, purity and cheerfulness; could be such a powerful symbol in my life!